36 Hour Countdown

December 8th, 2011

Feel like I’m about to go over a waterfall.  Can see the drop-off ahead and hear the booming water, but where I am now is still calm and tranquil.

Not sure if everything is going to fit into my backpack.  Guess I’ll find out tomorrow when I try stuffing it all in.

Lot of little details coming together.  Miss just one of them and they might turn me around at the border of some country.  For instance, yesterday I got a Yellow Fever shot (live vaccine) and round three of Hepatitis B.  Pretty much caught up on shots now.  I think.

A friend of mine (who is a world traveller) told me often on the night before he leaves on a big trip he lays awake in bed wondering if it’s all going to come together.  I know how he feels now, there’s a lot of unknowns in travelling.

Probably humans in general dislike unknowns, but I think it comes even harder on Americans as we’re so used to living lives of control.  Push a button and our garage door opens, push another to electronically set the temperature.  Want coffee?  Set the timer, it will be ready in the morning. 

All my machines do my bidding, I run a tight schedule, and often feel dependent on no one but myself.  This is an illusion of course, but adds up to me not always being happy when things are going on outside of my control.

But I think being in situations where I have to rely on others is healthy, even though scary. I think it’s healthy because it gives me practice in trusting God, which is also scary. Trusting God with the big, important things in life (like my life) is gosh-awful scary. I think the scare factor alone is why most people don’t do it (myself included many times).

Ok, enough soliloquy for tonight, I’m crashing. 

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